If you’re anything like me you always, I mean you always feel at least one step behind. You finish one project to turn around and find that it has been undone. You finally get the kitchen in order and then your kids decide they are hungry, you fold the “last” load of laundry to turn around and find a basket you forgot about, you get the floors cleaned and then everyone walks in with their shoes.  There are two many things vying for our attention to be able to, even for one moment, feel like we are done. House is done, bills are done, shopping is done, kids are fed, laundry is cleaned and put away, phone calls are made and floors are swept…Never, has this ever happened to me all at the same time in all my 15+ years of being a mom. There is always something on my to-do list. So if we never feel like we are “done” then how do we gracefully live like we are? How do we find that deep fullfillment of accomplishment when the list just keeps getting longer?

My house is not super large and covers 6 people and 2 cats. The list is never ending and even though I have a family command center with all the things, a planner and phone with a reminder setting, I still never quite feel done. I have read all the pinterest articles and tried all the free printables that mom bloggers have to offer. Now, I’m not saying that these haven’t helped me get a hold on my life but they are not the perfect answer. There is almost too much information out there and I find myself putting “get organized” or “print a chore chart” on my to-do list. There are some women that actually have it all together but are most likely wearing themselves to the core to get there. 

So if the endless array of resources doesn’t fully satisfy my need to get things done and have then stay done, what am I supposed to do? Throw in the towel and hope someone else will pick up the slack? Not likely. 

My birthday just passed, I turned 42. A ripe old age of maturity in which I thought that I would have my life neatly in order, fully and completely. I found myself worrying about my house being completely clean, all chores down, all things checked off by the time my birthday arrived. Why? So that I could have an actual day off. A day of rest. A day of reprieve. As the day inched closer and the laundry pile somehow sprouted legs, I came to the ugly concusion that it would not get done. I would perhaps have to lift a finger on my birthday. Now this is a first world problem at it’s finest but as a busy mom it is the only thing I longed for. 

As I came to the realization that all the things would be undone on my birthday, I decided to flip my expectations on their heads and actually pray not for them to be done but pray that I just wouldn’t notice. That I wouldn’t care if there were two overflowing baskets of clean laundry in the foyer, that I wouldnt notice the crumbs on the floor and the unmade beds. What if instead of wishing them to be done I just relied on the strength of the Lord to help me be content even in my undone life? To focus on being thankful for the messy house because that is just a sign of all the life that is being lived under our roof. It is an honor to care for my family and I should view it as such. 

I didn’t realzie that God showed up and blinded me to the messiness of my reality until the next day when I looked back on my birthday and realized that I did not only take a day off from my to do list but that nothing got accomplished at all. It was a true day of enjoyment. I had a friend knock on my door the afternoon of my birthday and I welcomed her in without any hesitation. I did in actuality have two loads of clean laundry next to the front door and the front room swarmed with toys and random things. In the midst of all of that I was able to enjoy a chat with my friend and not let the petty worry overtake me and I didn’t even spurt out an apology for the mess. I just let it be. 

This was a gift. The Lord knew that the only reprieve was in Him and not in my surroundings. He knew that if in fact I would have been able to check off the entire list before my birthday arrived that in my flesh I still would have been worried about every slight displacement of anything in my home. But I didn’t. I truly didn’t notice and it was most likely the best birthday I have ever had. 

So can we pray for strength to get things done but also for grace to be okay when they aren’t? Our to-do list needs to get done but we can pray for the Lord to direct us to the important things and not let the little undone things steal our joy. 

This morning as I write my house is messy and I could clean for hours. I did the most important things, dish washer is running, laundry is running and yes I did make my bed. But the rest can wait. I can live gracefully as I walk through piles of shoes, cracker crumbs and random toys. The LORD gives me strength to live in thankfulness for all that I have and not let the “I wishes” get in the way. 

Let’s pray:

LORD, you know my to do list.  You know my heart.  You know what upsets me and also what gives me peace. I surrender all of the things to you Lord. I pray that I would be okay in the not okay and that I can find rest amidst the undone by your strength alone. Thank you Jesus for equipping me for all the things I have to do in my day to day and I give them all to you. Thank you Jesus. AMEN!

He gives power to the weak

    and strength to the powerless.

 Even youths will become weak and tired,

    and young men will fall in exhaustion.

 But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength.

    They will soar high on wings like eagles.

They will run and not grow weary.

    They will walk and not faint.

Isaiah 40:29-31